2015 Top Nine

I was reflecting on 2015 a few nights ago when it *finally* occurred to me that the year was ending.
What automatically comes to my mind is how tough this year was.
We came through some painful illnesses, our son spent a good part of the year in a bad mood, my husband had few days off until he finally quit nine months into the year, and we outgrew our apartment to the point of discomfort.

Despite the difficulties, God never abandoned us and, as always, He showed Himself strong for us in our weakness.
God is good no matter what.

So here, in no particular order, are my top nine from 2015 as listed above:

The best birthday present: a new church-
In October 2014 we left the church we had been attending for over three years in search of a church closer to home. It was a disheartening search but finally, the last week of January (a week before my birthday) God lead us to visit the last King James only baptist church in our area.

Seeing our son make friends-
B didn't really have friends before we started attending our new church and its been a very big blessing to see him learn from others, be part of a group, and have lots of fun.

New friends, old friends, all good friends-
It's lovely to have friends who watch your back and pray for you from a distance. I don't think we'll ever understand the difference the intercession of others makes in our lives.

I was there for my nephew's birth-
Being present for my sister's son's birth is a memory I'll always cherish.

The freedom, joy and peace gained from leaving social media-
The longer I've been away from social media, the more I've learned about myself, and the easier it is for me to get along with others. I'm grateful I left.

The joy, growth, and love I share with my husband-
Marriage gets sweeter with age, by God's grace we'll continue to grow closer to Him and to each other.

God gave  me  us grace and strength to face each day-
We needed a lot of grace and a lot of strength this year and He made sure we had more than enough.

God met our needs each day and showered us with His tender mercies-
We never needed anything and His hand was always evident in everything we did.

Being able to teach all the children at church-
I taught the youngest children for a portion of the year and then moved to the older ones. I have loved getting to know them all and work with them on the Christmas Play. They've taught me a lot about life, God, and myself.

2015 was a year for growth. I've come out of it having learned a lot about myself. I only hope I can use my knowledge of myself to bear godly fruit. All in all, I'm glad to keep moving forward, and by God's grace I will.

2016 is already exciting- we're currently moving into a four bedroom house on an 18 600 sqf lot.
I cut my long hair and now its so short I can barely twist it into a bun. Lord willing we'll go to Mexico in November for my father-in-law's 70th birthday. My husband is no longer a chef and has started his own business- that will certainly make things interesting.
I'd me over the moon- literally- if Jesus came back and caught us all up to heaven.
Until then I'll keep trying to serve Him and enjoy His blessings the best I know how.

When I'm in a mood...

Lately I've been in a very off mood: I've been annoyed at everyone, I don't want to do anything (especially the things I normally love doing), and I really hate it when someone touches me- even my son.
I haven't been able to pin point what the root cause of it is and I haven't been able to shake it off.
I do know that it's just my flesh rearing its ugly head and trying to cause me to fall.

Something I heard long ago from Dilbert Terry and my own pastor recently said something similar is this- Christians ought to live by principle rather than feeling.

In times like these it's very easy to give your flesh free course. I feel really angry, uncomfortable, I don't want to deal with anyone, I don't want to do anything, I don't want to go anywhere, and because of all that I can feel justified in the flesh for doing things that make my flesh 'feel good'. For instance:
Maybe I don't take my anger out on people but I just sit in front of the TV most of the day, or sleep in and laze around, or even stare at my phone reading articles all day.
I may not take my anger out on anyone but I am still feeding my flesh by making myself 'feel good'.

To help myself live by principle rather than feeling there are a few things I try to do:

Read my bible A LOT. Jesus said this:

Now ye are clean through the word which

I have spoken unto you.

John 15:3

The Holy Spirit wrote this:

Husbands, love your wives, even as

Christ also loved the church, and gave 

himself for it;

that he might sanctify and cleanse it

with the washing of water by the word

Ephesians 5:25&26

Reading the bible makes you clean. When our flesh is particularly strong you have to weaken it by strengthening the inner man. The inner man is strengthened the same way your physical body is strengthened: food. 

And Jesus answered him, saying, it is

written, that man shall not live by bread

alone, but by every word of God.

Luke 4:4

I've been reading through 2 Samuel and moving on to 1 Kings. I love the accounts written there. There is always something new to learn. For the particular mood I'm in it helps to read something I can easily pay attention to so it helps to read the books that have more action in them. I read more that way too because the accounts are so engaging.

Reading the bible also keeps the lines of communication open. I may not feel like reading the bible and I may not feel like praying but God is still talking to me and teaching me from His Word. 

Pray.

Get everything off your chest and give all problems to God.

Get up early.

This may not have any affect on you but it surely does on me. Forcing myself out of bed early in the morning makes a big difference in my day.

The only reason I get up early is to do my devotions. If I decide to sleep in my flesh has won for the day.

Getting up to do my devotions shows my flesh I will not be controlled by it, I will be controlled by what is right and pleasing to God- spending quiet time alone with Him.

Don't give place to evil thoughts.

Something that happens when I'm in a bad mood is I begin to get angry at everyone for everything. My mind will bring up things I don't like about someone and the temptation is to keep those thought coming to make me feel better about myself.

The thought of foolishness is sin:

Proverbs 24:9b

Idle thoughts about people are foolish and they cause division.

Any time an evil thought about someone comes into my head I cast it out an apologize to the Lord. Allowing myself to think badly about someone will affect how I treat them and I do not want that. If they are wicked, God will deal with them, I don't have to.

My pastor says this a lot- keep short accounts with God.

Act on a matter of conviction right away. When God deals with you about something, confess/apologize/fix it right away no matter where you are.

Once you get it right then stay right. 

Walk close to the Lord.

Well that's all. I hope this helps you in some way. Yes, this odd mood I'm in has prevented me from writing. That and I've been busy- it's almost Christmas!

Have a good Wednesday!

In Everything Give Thanks- part 2

A few weeks ago I posted a long list of thank yous to God.
It was Canadian Thanksgiving and I wanted to post something for it. At first I thought I'd post about all the things I love that I am grateful for (that's the fashionable thing to do on Thanksgiving). However, I began to consider this blog and the whole reason it exists: bringing glory to God. Thus, In Everything Give Thanks- Part 1 was written and I just poured out everything I could think of.
That was not the first time I've just thanked God for His blessings. A few years ago I was listening to a preacher talk about being grateful and just pouring out praises, gratitude, and glory to God. Since then many of my prayers are just prayers of thanks and all my prayers start out with thanks. Occasionally when I can't sleep I just start thanking God for things.
It's not a routine, habit, or something on my checklist. I'm actually grateful so I show my gratitude.
If you don't praise God on a regular basis, you should start, it changes your life.

While I understand that positive words make a difference and positive thinking makes a difference I am not a big promoter of either.

I like to be practical and if a situation is bad, I'm not going to lie to myself and others just to be positive.

I am, however, grateful and gratitude is a practical persons positive outlook.

I never really thought about gratitude until one of my favourite online preachers said this: 'nothing shows you are weak more than ingratitude'.

That hit me so hard I have never been the same since.

As it started to work on me I realized for myself that being grateful takes strength.

It is easy to say thank you and show your appreciation on Thanksgiving but to look at situations that seem hopeless and find something to be grateful for is something else. I did talk about that in my blog post Grateful.

God blessed me with a good home, two christian parents, all my five senses, the ability to be independent, I was born in a free country, and I'm not constantly living in fear for my life.
Just as easily I could have been born to a broken home, with God hating parents, lacking the ability to see or hear or speak, and too many issues for me to live independently.
We can't control the situations we are born into. I was born into a good one and I can't take that for granted. There are people out there who would do anything for the stability God has given me, it's wasted on me if I don't appreciate it.

If they are ever taken away I do not want to regret not praising God for them.

I know what I have and I know what I deserve.

In everything give thanks: for this is the

will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

1 Thessalonians 5:18

If you are wondering what God's will is for you life, start giving thanks

And let the peace of God rule in your

hearts, to the which also ye are called in

one body; and be ye thankful.

Colossians 3:15

The amount of peace you get from being thankful is immeasurable.

There are things I would like but my gratitude for the things I have outweigh my desires for anything else.

My pastor said this a few weeks ago:

"God is good all the time. He's not good because of what He does, He is good because that's His character".

It's true.

If you think when everything is going well that God is good but when they go down the toilet, through the sewer and into the deepest most disgusting place of the ocean that He's not good- you're wrong.

God is good no matter what happens.

He gave His Son for you. That is good no matter what way you look at it.

We love him, because he first loved us.

1 John 4:19

We wouldn't know God if He didn't show love to us first. Our love for God originates with Him. We have hope because of Him, we have eternal life because of Him, we can enjoy the good things of this life because of Him. If you can't be grateful for that, you won't be grateful for anything.

I hope this was a blessing and a help to you in some way!

He Giveth More Grace

My husband and I have been through the ringer this past summer.

He's been working non stop so I've been going and going without any breaks at all.

Yes, I am a stay-at-home-mom but we need breaks too.

As much as we love our children and enjoy being home with them, it's nice to sit down, eat a meal uninterrupted, not have to clean, not have to chase little ones around, not have to constantly correct a child, and not have to worry.

I have not had that at all for a while. I did get a nice lunch with my pastor's wife last week- we sat and talked for about four hours. That's been my only reprieve.

My husband has had it way worse, working and working, on his feet all day and all night, dealing with more than his share at the restaurant.

It's been grueling so far and August is showing signs of being even more busy than June and July.

I will not complain- I'd rather we be too busy to rest than one of us losing our health or something tragic.

In any case, it's times like these that, while it's difficult, you don't really consider it to be a trial.

When my pastor asks for prayer requests at church we hear all kinds of needs:

People desperately needing jobs

difficult pregnancies

crippling injuries

family issues

and so on, and you look at your prayer request: working too much, no time to rest, and you don't say anything because it's not bad compared to the needs of others.

It's been hard, these days, to catch me in a really good mood. My fatigue has made it harder for me to control my flesh and I've been very selfish, cranky, and contentious. A lot of these things happen inside and I am able to filter them before they come out, but still, the things that come up in my mind show me the depth of my depravity and selfishness.

It actually makes me really sad but it's an opportunity to learn.

Every second Saturday of the month our church goes to the Care Home and ministers to the old folks there. We sing hymns, read psalms, and socialize. Last time my pastor took favourites and a song was requested I had not heard since childhood: He Giveth More Grace.

It is a beautiful song, lyrically and musically, I choked up just singing it. I posted a picture with the words of two verses and the chorus on Instagram a few weeks ago:

So you see, it's absolutely biblical and incredibly comforting.

It occurred to me yesterday morning that, though I sing these songs and know the verses, I don't exactly 'cast all my care upon him'.
I mean, last year when my husband was out of a job for six months I was actively casting my care, establishing my faith, and singing these songs.
Right now, we are not dealing with a tragedy, we're not roughing it through poverty, we have good health but our labours have increased and we've reached the end of our 'hoarded resources'. Now is just a good time, as any, to cast our cares on him.
Jesus has been through these times- the people were always following him, he had no time to eat, his burden for the people was too great, he was tired and weary, constantly traveling- He knows what it is like.
These times, while they are not great trials that plague us, we are still pressed and tried. It is a small flame but it can still burn you.
What I'm learning is that these seemingly small hardships prove how deeply we rely on God. It is SO easy to rely on Him during big trials. Those are times we know we have to live by faith because there are often things we cannot see and do not understand. Right now, weeks become months of constant, unending labour and what was tiring at first has become exhausting and unbearable.
I did not realize it until Tuesday what a difficulty this has become and what a monster it had created in me. I've been complaining, in my mind, about all the things I've needed to do and all the extra things thrust on me since my husband is too busy to do them. I wonder what all the things rising up in me are coming from and I've realized I haven't relied on the Lord.
I've been reading, studying, praying, attending church, and worshiping God, but I haven't asked him for the strength to get us through this time.
Without voicing it inside or outside, I've relied on my strength to get me through the summer. I have not once asked God to take over and give me the grace, not only physically, but to mentally and Spiritually be able to deal with the exhaustion and the things that come with it.
Most of the things happening right now are out of our control. What we can control is how we handle them.

What I need to do is this:
Ask for forgiveness for complaining and being selfish
Acknowledge that I am not strong enough to carry these things on my own
Tell God what I find difficult
Give the difficulties I have over to God
When complaints rise up in me, give them to God

We have verses and songs, that are available to us but they aren't helpful unless we claim them. Until we realize that we need God in every kind day- good, okay, not great, terrible.
Well I've exhausted my store of endurance, my strength has failed, I've reached the end of my hoarded resources but my father's full giving has only begun.

Humble yourselves therefore under the

mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you

in due time:

Casting all your care upon him; for he

careth for you.

 Be sober, be vigilant; because your

adversary the devil, as a roaring lion,

walketh about, seeking whom he may

devour:

whom resist stedfast in the faith,

knowing that the same afflictions are

accomplished in your brethren that are in

the world.

But the God of all grace, who hath called

us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus,

after that e have suffered a while, make

you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you.

1 Peter 5:7-10

God uses the word 'all' there for a reason. Every single care we have, we can cast on Him. In the same vein, He mentions the devil, seeking whom he may destroy. If we hold on to our cares- small and great- our flesh will take over and the devil will destroy us. Whatever you have that is burdening you, give it to God, ask Him for the strength to endure it, and grace to handle it- He will grant you those things and more if you just 'humble yourself under the mighty hand of God'.

I hope this was a blessing and a help to you. I really hope it makes sense, I wrote this to get it off my chest and organize my thoughts.