Grateful

Gratitude is becoming an endangered species. It is one of the things consumerism has done to the world. We have and are not grateful because we can buy it of our own hand and get more if needed.
There are two big things I want. One of things thing money can buy, the other one can only be given.
The thing money can buy is a house. A nice house, not too big, with a good size yard- for a garden and for my son, in a nice area so I can go for runs every morning or evening. This desire has been on my mind lately because we almost had the opportunity to move but it was taken away from us.
Today in my bible reading I came across this story:

1 Samuel 8

Starting in verse 4- Then all the elders of Israel gathered

themselves together, and came to Samuel

unto Ramah,

And said unto him, Behold, thou art old,

and thy sons walk not in thy ways: now

make us a king to judge us like all the

nations.

But the thing displeased Samuel, when

they said, Give us a king to judge us. And

Samuel prayed unto the LORD.

And the LORD said unto Samuel, hearken

unto the voice of the people in all that they

 say unto thee: for they have not rejected

thee, but they have rejected me, that I

should not reign over them.

skipping to verse 9- Now therefore hearken unto

their voice: howbeit yet protest solemnly unto them,

and shew them the manner of the king that

shall reign over them.

And Samuel told all the words of the

LORD unto the people that asked of him a

king.

And he said, This will be the manner of

the king that shall reign over you: He will

take your sons, and appoint them for

himself, for his chariots, and to be his

horsemen; and some shall run before

his chariots.

ANd he will appoint him captains over

thousands, and captains over fifties; and

will set them to ear his ground, and to reap

his harvest, and to make his instruments of

war, and instruments of his chariots.

And he will take your daughters to be

confectionaries, and to be cooks, and to be

bakers,

and he will take your fields, and your

vineyards, and your oliveyards, even

the best of them, and give them to his

servants.

And he will take the tenth of your seed,

and of your vineyards, and give to his

officers, and to his servants.

And he will take your menservants, and

your maidservants, and your goodliest

young men, and your asses, and put them 

to his work.

He will take the tenth of your sheep; and

ye shall be his servants.

And ye shall cry out in that day because

of your king which ye shall have chosen

you; and the LORD will not hear you in that

day.

This account struck me as I read it.

I wonder if this is like my husband and myself. We have a nice apartment- the ceilings are high, two bathrooms, a nice big kitchen, a big balcony that gets lots of sun, all for $1000 a month. The only thing is we live in a not so nice neighborhood and other tenants are really loud at night. Even so, we have a decent situation right now, by stretching our hands out to get a house by any (reasonable) means, are we rejecting God's will?

After everything Samuel tells the Israelites about the King that would be appointed, what do they say-

Nevertheless the people refused to obey

the voice of Samuel; and they said, Nay;

but we will have a king over us;

That we also may be like all the nations;

and that our king may judge us, and go out

before us, and fight our battles.

And Samuel heard all the words of the

people, and he rehearsed them in the ears

of the LORD.

And the LORD said to Samuel, Hearken

unto their voice, and make them a king.

And Samuel said unto the men of Israel, Go

ye everyman unto his city.

1 Samuel 19-22

To the children of Israel, having a king was worth everything he'd take from them.

I wonder if that is like us sometimes. We want something so terribly we'd do anything to get it, no matter how much trouble it causes us.

I look at our life in our little apartment: I have many comforts others don't and I still want more. The troubles I have with apartment living would be magnified in a house but I still feel I'd gladly take the troubles and the house if we could manage it.
I'm not willing to speculate 'what if' the children of Israel had continued on under God's style of governance. I do know, that the trouble they ran into under Saul would not have happened.
So for now I must be patient and grateful.
Grateful for my big kitchen, two washrooms, and my sweet little balcony garden. Grateful I don't have an entire house to clean, I don't have to worry about my son falling down the stairs, and I don't have to worry about making sure three different doors and all the windows are closed when we go out. I am grateful we only pay rent, not repairs, maintenance, and pest control. I am grateful it's easy for my son to make friends in the playground because there are lots of children in the complex we see often.
I'm not a 'think positively' kind of person but thinking practically has helped me with this.

The other thing I want is another baby. I'd love a little girl but I'll take what I can get.
It's something I've sought the Lord over, wept uncontrollably about, fasted and prayed about, done a whole bunch of things that 'help' with these matters but I have not carried a baby to term.
I can think about it calmly now because through all my prayers and studies God has reassured me concerning this matter.
I was out with my son and husband the other day and as I watched them I realized something: how blessed we are to have each other. Right now I can focus on my precious son. Michael and I can love on him like nothing else. We can enjoy him thoroughly because our attention is not divided from him.
This is a time to be grateful for. This is a time of (relative) calmness that we can enjoy.
When, and if, the Lord grants us another baby, our lives will change even more and the steadiness we know now will vanish in a second.
When, and if, the Lord grants us another baby, it will be in His own time when He knows it is right.

There is no wisdom nor understanding

nor counsel against the Lord.

Proverbs 21:30

We have no idea of the troubles God is keeping us from by not giving us the things we think we want/need. By allowing Him to take the reins and be in control, you are saving yourself from a lot of unnecessary problems. It is not always easy to let these things go but but God is so good. While He guides us and teaches us He gives us the tools to grow, and patience to learn.  While I can easily write about things now, it was a process to get me to the place where I could face them with equanimity. God will help you if you surrender to His will. You will be blessed all the more for it.

All the way my saviour leads me,

What have I to ask beside?

Can I doubt His tender mercy,

Who through life has been my Guide?

Heav'nly peace, divinest comfort,

Here by faith in Him to dwell!

For I know, whate'er befall me,

Jesus doeth all things well;

For I know, whate'er befall me,

Jesus doeth all things well.

All the Way My Saviour Leads Me- Frances Crosby

Rules For a Spiritual Life

My recent post 'Rules For Life' contained rules I *try* to abide by to keep myself from getting into too much trouble with people here on earth.
What's way more important is my relationship with God.
This post, I want to share some of the things I do to keep myself walking with God in the Spirit.
As long as I am walking with God, I am effortlessly able to keep myself from unnecessary trouble and maintain all my personal rules.

1) Read your bible and pray everyday.
This is a no brainer. Everyone knows you cannot have a relationship with someone without talking and listening to them. A relationship with God is the same way- reading your bible is reading His Word, praying is talking to Him. Yes He knows everything, but He wants us to talk to Him about it. Praying strengthens you in ways you'll never know until you start making a decisive effort to bend your knees and pray.

And Jesus answered him, saying, It is

written, That man shall not live by bread

alone, but by every word of God.

Luke 4:4

That's not hard to understand: we need the Word of God to live.

As newborn babes, desire the sincere

milk of the word, that ye may grow thereby:

1 Peter 2:2

We need it to grow. The more you read it, the more you desire it, the more you grow. Nothing bad comes out of reading God's Word.

This is something, my pastor's wife's father pointed out-

And it came to pass in those days, that

he went out into a mountain to pray, and

continued all night in prayer to God.

Luke 16:12

Jesus found praying more comforting than sleep! That is our example! If you are a Christian that does not think it's necessary to set time aside for prayer, there's something wrong.

2) Study your bible.

Reading is great! It is great for a baby Christian, it is great when your mind is tired, it is great to read as a family, but an older Christian needs strong meat. Strong meat comes from studying.

For when for the time ye ought to be

teachers, ye have need that one teach you

again which be the first principles of the

oracles of God; and are become such as

have need of milk, and not of strong meat.

For everyone that useth milk is unskillful

in the word of righteousness: for he is a

babe.

But strong meat belongeth to them that

are of full age, even those who by reason of

use have their senses exercised to discern

both good and evil.

Hebrews 5:12-14

Studying the bible means cross referencing, line upon line, comparing spiritual things with spiritual to find out what the bible really says. Something Paul may write two lines about in Ephesians may be given a full chapter in Romans.

In 1 Peter it says, 'for charity shall cover the multitude of sins', you wouldn't know the depth of what charity is unless you read about it in 1 Corinthians 13.

Lastly, and most importantly, God tells us to study:

Study to shew thyself approved unto

God, a workman that needeth not to be

ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

2 Timothy 2:15

3) Apply what you've learned

Submit yourselves therefore to God.

Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

James 4:7

But ye, brethren, be not weary in well

doing.

And if any man obey not our word by

this epistle, note that man, and have no

company with him, that he may be

ashamed.

2 Thessalonians 3:14

But be ye doers of the word, and not

hearers only, deceiving your own selves.

For if any be a hearer of the word, and

not a doer, he is like unto a man beholding

his natural face in a glass:

For he beholdeth himself, and goeth his

way, and straightway forgetteth what

manner of man he was.

James 1:22-24

Those are just a few verses of many that talk about obedience, submission, and following after God.

The fact is, you cannot grow if you refuse to apply what you've learned. The more you exercise self control, the more 'natural' it becomes.

Tools to help with the three things above:

1- Set a specific time to read, study, and pray

You will not do it if you leave it up to 'if I have time'. You'll never have time. You'll keep coming up with things to do.

Get up early and do your devotions. If you can't, set aside a specific time during the day to study.

You must come to the realization that your relationship with God is THE priority in your life. If you have your relationship with God straight, all other areas of your life fall into order. My life is a testament to this; my pastor, pastor's I've listened to on this internet have preached on this.

2-Write down prayer requests and collect missionary prayer cards

I have a little book I write down prayer requests in and I get a hold of as many missionary prayer cards as I can. This helps me put thought and effort into praying for others. If I don't write it down I will forget. I've noticed too, if I'm not particularly interested in praying, I can't help but pray more and more because of all the requests given to me. I am constrained to pray about all of them. Make it a particular priority to pray for each request that comes up.

Praying always with all prayer and

supplication in the Spirit, and watching

thereunto with all perseverance and

supplication for all saints;

Ephesians 6:18

Confess your faults one to another, and

pray one for another, that ye may be

healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a

righteous man availeth much.

James 5:16

Those verses say it all.

3- Fast

This is actually a whole blog post in one point- one I do intend to write. For now, suffice it to say that fasting helps teach you to control your flesh. A great chapter on fasting is Isaiah 58. Here is a bit of it:

Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to

loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the

heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go

free, and that ye break every yoke?

Isaiah 58:6

Notice what fasting does: loose bands of wickedness, undo heavy burdens (are you hurting about something? fast), let the oppressed go free, break every yoke- fasting liberates us and builds our relationship with God.

4-Listen to sermons

I have learned so much from listening to sermons while doing chores, knitting, and so on. I've learned how to pray from hearing preachers pray, I've been reminded of hymns I once knew, I've been reproved, rebuked, exhorted, edified, strengthened, and blessed through preaching. If nothing else, it keeps my mind from wandering to places it should not.

5-Sing praises

If you're wondering how to make melody in your heart to the Lord (Ephesians 5:19), this is how. I take time, ideally every day but that hasn't been possible lately, to sing songs to God. Sometimes I go through a hymn book, sometimes I sing scripture songs, but I make sure to listen to what I'm singing and mean it. I find that at least one of the songs I sing remains in my head the rest of the day or through the week.

If you think this isn't important then you haven't read the book of Psalms at all.

Praise ye the LORD. O give thanks unto

the Lord; for he is good: for his mercy

endureth for ever.

Psalm 106:1

6-Memorize scripture

Knowing scripture will get you through every situation you will come across. The first year of my marriage I memorized Proverbs 31:10-31. I intend to be a virtuous woman and that passage has it all. I quote it to myself a lot because sometimes I really need to remember it.

I've quoted scripture to myself during scary situations in doctor's offices and hospitals, when I have trouble sleeping, and when I don't know what to think.
When I was in labour and my contractions were getting unbearable I would close my eyes and quote Proverbs 31. The pain was still there but it kept me from going crazy.
The more you read the bible the more you will know it the more it will come up every day.

Don't underestimate the power of knowing scripture. 

7-Go To Church

This isn't just a Sunday thing, it's a Wednesday thing, and every other time there is an activity or service at church.

Fellowship helps keep you faithful. If you don't believe me, stay away from church for a month and see what that does to your relationship with God. There is a lot you cannot control at church, and that is a good thing. To be exposed to preaching that God gave a preacher to preach to you is special. Not only that, there are people there willing to pray for you. Prayer is powerful and we all need as much of it as we can get.

There has been many times I have not felt like going to church but I've gone and never regretted it. God gave church to us for our benefit and His glory. Don't shun it.

BEWARE!!! If you find yourself too tired or busy to have personal time with God because you're too involved with church, cut down your church activities. It is very easy to go through the motions and look spiritual when you are actively involved at church but if you don't have a relationship with God that goes before those things, your work is dead. Being faithful to God and being faithful to church are two separate things.


I hope this was a help to you in some way!

Rules for Life

I always have lots of ideas about things to blog about but when I actually sit down to blog I find myself struggling for ideas and words. Most of the time I have a thought but I find it hard to write about clearly and concisely. I think I just need to practice writing but I also think some of my ideas are so small that they can be all condensed into one post- like this one.

I don't know how anyone regulates their lives. I'm not talking about biblical standards I'm talking about general things that keep us from having too many regrets and messes to clean up.
I started making rules for myself in high school- seriously too late if you ask me- but they helped me make better choices.
See, if I was approaching a situation that had similar characteristics to situations in the past, I'd go with the rule I set for that situation.
For example: I had a group of friends who were the 'cool' kids. We thought we were cool but I later found out everyone hated us (lol right?). Anyways, there were a lot of us girls and gossip and things would go around. My first year of high school- grade eight- was so traumatic for me and situation after situation would rise up.
I remember crying in the washroom one day and a few of my 'friends' found me. They asked what was wrong so I told them and I said, 'don't tell anyone'. They agreed. I had learned to tell people not to tell anyone because things that I thought were obvious secrets were not kept as secret.
A little while later a friend- this one was a real friend- came up and asked if I was okay. When I asked her why she asked she let it slip that the two who found me told her I had been crying.
Well, that started a huge thing but I came out of it and learned this: NEVER TELL A GIRL ANYTHING- even if you tell her not to tell anyone.
That became my number one rule through high school and it has carried me beyond.
I guess I'll start listing off some of my rules:

Please note- these are my rules for me, they may or may not apply to you. Take from them what you will.
1) Never, for any reason, for any purpose, tell anything to anyone who has yet to prove themselves trustworthy.
I've set this rule down for my husband as well- do not talk about personal things with any girl- relation or otherwise for any reason.
Girls talk. We talk about appropriate things, inappropriate things (for men to hear), very personal things, we just talk. In all the talking we lose our filters and run away with ourselves- especially if we're talking to someone we're close to.
I've made the mistake of telling people things I shouldn't have. This is just the reason my rule is to keep personal things personal. The only people I tell anything really personal to (besides my husband of course) is my pastor's wife and my sister. My pastor's wife can pray for whatever it is and my sister is my second best friend (after my husband) and she understands almost everything.
I could probably talk to a few more people but I don't want to find out the hard way that they are untrustworthy.
Keeping your thoughts and struggles (I'm talking about smaller ones) limited to a few people limits the damage they can possibly do to yourself and others.
Watch who you talk to. (By the way, men are exempt from this rule simply because I do not talk to them about personal things- it's immodest)

2) Never, for any reason, no matter how you feel, no matter how sorely you are tempted, do anything wrong to prove a point.
This took me a long time to learn and it is a huge rule to abide by.
Last October I was wronged by some family members. Instead of talking it through and dealing with it maturely I just left the conversation.
Instead of them realizing that they had done something wrong, I had to apologize to them for my rudeness and the point I was trying to make was never made known.
That was a big thing, but these things can happen on a small scale in everyday  life too.
For instance, if my husband does something that angers me and, instead of talking rationally to him about it, I yell and make a scene, the whole reason I'm upset gets lost in a pointless argument. I'll just be branded as a contentious woman and he'll write me off as emotional and irrational.
If I calmly talk to him about the source of my anger, I will be heard and the peace will be kept.

3) Don't do anything you will regret.
Of course we do things we regret all the time. We try to keep ourselves from that as much as possible. What I'm talking about here is small things:
-Do daily devotions- this is rather a big one but it's a small thing that makes a huge difference in my day
-Always go with comfortable clothing- I always look frumpy but I don't care as long as I'm comfortable
-Go to the washroom when there is one close and convenient
-Always bring a bottle of water with you
-Bring a purse or make sure to wear something with pockets when you go to the park (I hate carrying things)
-Go to sleep when your body tells you to
-Don't listen to worldly music- I despise the current popular music but I have a soft spot for gangster rap like Eazy E, Ice Cube and that bunch. Even though I still like it, it is not good for me to listen to, I get really aggressive, impatient and hateful. If I listen to it at all, my testimony for that day is gone and I am always filled with regret.
Those are just a few things that I make sure to do to keep myself from regret and discomfort later on.

4) Never make definitive statements about yourself or something you're planning to do.
First part of this one: talking about yourself.
I try not to talk about myself. I do talk about things in my life, things I'm going through, need help with, and so on but I mean things like this: I'm a really good knitter, I'm a great cook, I like big words, I'm a prolific gardener, and things along that line. Something else I avoid is posting things on social media and writing 'this is so me' under them. Of course it depends on what it is- if its meant to be a joke then fine but serious things make you look foolish.
I avoid talking about myself like that. I always prove myself wrong anyways. There's nothing wrong with talking about things you enjoy doing or making your preferences known (politely) but building yourself up with your words only makes your fall hurt more.

Give her of the fruit of her hands; and

let her own works praise her in the gates.

Proverbs 31:31

If I am a great knitter, I don't have to tell people about it, my work will show it. If I'm a good cook, my food will show it. We don't have to praise ourselves or lift ourselves up. Many times, those personality memes and articles are what we wish we were but are far from what we actually are.

Besides, as soon as you start talking about yourself like this I'm pretty sure people just tune you out. I tune people out. I'd rather get to know people by their actions and their words, not by what they say about themselves.

Last thing about this: 

For out of the abundance of the

heart the mouth speaketh

Matthew 12:34b

If all you think about is yourself, you'll talk about yourself. If you're interested in winning souls, being a good testimony, and being the Lord's servant by serving others, your focus will be upward, then outward- it will never be inward.

This is not something I struggle with- at least I don't think I do- I made this a rule for me when I saw others doing it. I only know a few who do it now and they are not people I'd like to be like at all.

Next part- talking about something you're planning to do:

Last summer I was sure I was going to take my knitting and crocheting further by opening up an Etsy store. Guess what, I didn't do it. It's not because I'm lazy, lost interest or anything like that. It's because God worked on me and showed me it was not the right path for me.
Of course, I told everybody I was opening one up and I did not enjoy explaining my change of mind to unsaved family members. To them it looks like I can't follow through, they don't understand my relationship with God.
That is a small example, but there are bigger ones to consider, especially concerning your testimony.
If you are prayerfully considering something, that is one matter, but to advertise before God has even given his permission is another matter entirely.
Guard what comes out of your mouth. Words make a world of difference.

Boast not thyself of to morrow; for thou

knowest not what a day may bring forth.

Proverbs 27:1

5) Don't do anything you do not have peace with.

I struggle with this one. It ties into rule 4 about saying things you're not sure about. A lot of times our words can trap us into doing something we're not supposed to do or we don't want to do.

If you're set to do something and the Holy Spirit inside you is strongly opposing it, put a stop to it right away. It's better to disappoint people than to sin against God. Your relationship with Him outweighs any relationship on the earth.

6) Take your time and do it right
This applies from small things like knitting, crocheting, sewing, to preparing Sunday School crafts, and raising children and things like that.
I've wasted time and yarn simply because I did not take the time to count my stitches, place a stitch marker, or record my progress. The thing about crocheting and knitting is if you make a mistake, you may have spent an hour working on it, then you'll spend another hour backtracking, finding your mistake, unraveling, and yet another hour working to the place you were before you realized your mistake.That's three hours gone because of lack of attention, counting, and so on.
Now about a bigger issue- my son, the bible says:

but a child left to himself bringeth

his mother to shame.

Proverbs 29:15b

If I take the time now to train my son up right, it will be less heartache and trouble in the future. If I watch him play instead of playing with my phone, I'll be able to see the things I need to, get to know him, and correct him when need be.
Doing thing the right way takes time, effort, and sacrifice but it is rewarding and more time efficient.

7) Do not do anything hastily.

Also, that the soul be without knowledge,

it is not good; and he that hasteth 

with his feet sinneth.

Proverbs 19:2b

He that is slow to wrath is of great

understanding: but he that is hasty of

spirit exalteth folly

Proverbs 14:29

The thoughts of the diligent tend only to

plenteousness; but of every one that is

hasty only to want.

Proverbs 21:5

Seest thou a man that is hasty in his

words? there is more hope of a fool

than of him. 

Proverbs 29:20

Be not rash with thy mouth, and let not

thine heart be hasty to utter any thing

before God: for God is in heaven, and thou

upon earth: therefore let thy words be few.

Ecclesiastes 5:2

Just reading the above verses will show you that this rule is not at all like rule 6. This rule goes deeper, into how I say things, what I say, how I react, what makes me angry, what I buy, and so many more things. This rule has a lot to do with making decisions. I have never regretted sitting on a decision. I have always regretted being too quick to make a choice. Take your time and do the right thing.

There you have it, seven life rules that I *try* to abide by. This is not meant to be a spiritual list but of course there is a spiritual aspect to them- since I endeavor to be a spiritual person. I'll probably write out a list of Spiritual rules I abide by. Actually, I wouldn't call them spiritual rules but rules that help me walk with the Lord and keep me out of my flesh.

I hope this was helpful to you in some way.